Yelena had invited us. Her grandfather was a courier in Moscow who misplaced a package. He went home straight away, packed and caught a train to Kazakstan. She travelled almost as far with her husband following opportunity to a second hand car yard in New Zealand and a thriving accounts business. Life is hard she told me. So we are hard on our children. They need to survive. You wear sequins and shawls brought in suitcases from far away and enjoy being Russian in a hall with cabaret, potato salad and soft drinks.